


don't.

by faculae



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Best Friends, Brooding, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Wet Dream, get ready for th fluff, iwa has a pottymouth, trope-y garbage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-19
Updated: 2015-07-19
Packaged: 2018-04-10 01:25:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4371803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faculae/pseuds/faculae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>it only takes a day to remember you loved your best friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	don't.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [boikawas](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=boikawas).



"But what if she wasn't like everyone else? What if she was different, hmm? What would you say then?"

Damn. He didn't know enough about this shit as he thought he did. He sighed and rubbed his eyes harshly with the palms of his hands. It was 2 am, and his patience was steadily decreasing as heavy-lidded seconds passed by.

"God, Oikawa. I dunno." He shook his head while he readjusted his hands on his chest. "I don't know the last thing about girls."

Tooru was silent. "Sorry. Damn."

Hajime scoffed and turned to look into his eyes. "Listen, Oikawa. You didn't do anything wrong. I just have no goddamn idea what to tell you. But. Good luck with her, I guess. Dunno how they could say no to your sorry ass anyway."

A small laugh escaped his friend's lips. "Goodnight, Iwa. See you tomorrow."

Hajime rolled his eyes and stared up at the ceiling. 

"Goodnight." He mumbled after a couple thoughts drifted through his mind, and he slowly fell asleep.

\--

Fuck, oh _fuck_.

Damn.

He was only a few seconds away. Below him, a head of brown hair bobbed along him. Hajime was breathing quickly, unable to stay too quiet. He was only vaguely aware of his embarrassment, but he didn't really care. The feeling of bare skin against his own was enough to melt him. Those lips and--

He was so close and--

 _Oh!_ Shit!

Sultry brown eyes watched him from below, pleasurably continuing.

\--

Hajime awoke, drenched. Damn it. He looked at the clock on the side table, and cursed the stinging red numbers. It was 4 am. Groggily, he pulled himself from the covers to his dresser to grab a new pair of briefs. He was halfway to the bathroom when it hit him.

He had a fucking dream about Oikawa. Wait. Fuck. No, he fucking had a dream about Oikawa. It worked either way. Whatever. But damn. He wasn't sure whether or not he wanted to think about how it made him feel. It must have been triggered by all the girl talk. Right? Right. Nothing to do with Oikawa. He spent the next ten minutes sitting on the bathroom floor, googling "wet dreams about best friend".

He pinched the bridge of his nose. It was just that feeling: waking from a dream where you loved someone and it felt real. But the reality was that they were estranged or a stranger or. Damn, or worse, your best friend. It seemed normal, from all the yahoo answers. Why in hell he needed the affirmation, he didn't know. Whatever. It was just one of those things.

That didn't really change the way he still sort of ached. The reality of it was overwhelming--it was like it had been real. His heart still felt like it was doing cartwheels. He didn't like boys. Or Oikawa, as far as he had ever looked into it. Which, admittedly wasn't much, but he didn't need to reassess his sexuality over this. It was just a dream, and Oikawa was just his friend. That was it.

He rested his head against the wall, only to be interrupted by a quiet rasp on the door.

"Hey, Iwa-Chan. Are you okay?" It was Oikawa, and his voice was cool and calm.

Hajime could feel himself flushing. He avoided the memory of his steely coos that had echoed in his dreams. He shook the thought away and scrambled off the floor to switch off the lights. He pushed the door open, nearly hitting Oikawa. 

"Hey, shh. Everyone's asleep, you blubbering asshole." He whispered. He couldn't make out Oikawa's expression.

"I asked if you were alright," He whispered back. His brown eyes were curious, maybe even concerned. Hajime avoided looking at him too long. 

"Shut up, I'm fine. It's called taking a piss." Hajime ushered him back across the hall and into the makeshift bed.

They were both quiet as they climbed back in, but Hajime never heard him fall asleep.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Oikawa finally asked, turning to him.

Bad? Well. Maybe it depended on what he meant by bad. He didn't want to categorize it under "good", but it... certainly didn't belong under "bad".

"I dunno."

"What do you mean, 'you don't know'?" Oikawa chuckled. "You seemed pretty scared."

"No! Damn, Oikawa, I'm fine."

There was another faint laugh from Oikawa as he shifted. "Something else, then."

Hajime didn't know why Oikawa had to be so frustrating this early in the morning. It was fair enough to be concerned. Oikawa was fairly open with him, and he knew his struggles and faults. Hajime tried be the same way. Although, he never really had anything too heavy to share, and he wasn't particularly good at sharing his feelings. But he couldn't ever say anything about this--ever. It just wasn't the same sort of situation. It was probably better if he didn’t know. The thought of Oikawa knowing made him shiver. He didn't need another thing to be teased about.

"Whatever you're thinking, stop." He said eventually, but Oikawa's breaths were soft and even as he slept beside him. Hajime sighed and returned his glare to the dark ceiling. "It doesn't matter."

\--

"Iwa-chan, you've overslept..." Oikawa was flat on his stomach, leaning on one arm. He nudged him with his fingertips. The sun was coming in through the curtains, hitting Oikawa in just the right light to make him glow. Hajime draped an arm over his eyes as if it would block out the morning light (and Oikawa).

"Iwa-chan! Hey! It's 11 am already! I showered and ate. Your mom made some great--"

"Stop flirting with my mom, Oikawa." He flipped away from him to sit up.

"Also, you left your, ahh--those. In the bathroom." Oikawa said, pointing to the soiled briefs on the ground.

Hajime flushed, almost instantly. He couldn't find any words to say. He stood up and quickly tossed them into his hamper. It was whatever. It was normal. Guys have dreams like that, and there's no stopping it. Although... he hoped the best friend theme would stop.

"Was she cute, Iwa?" Oikawa laughed, golden and clear. It made him nervous.

"Alright, whatever." Hajime's ears were red, he noticed in the mirror on his dresser. "It's normal. Don't act like it hasn't happened to you."

Oikawa didn't say anything, so he figured that was the end. 

"Honestly, Iwa, I don't think it has."

Hajime turned to him, and the only expression Oikawa wore was pensive. Oh, god. Were they really discussing wet dreams?

"Well, it's normal."

"Then I'm abnormal. As I should be, don't you think?"

"Shut up, damn. You don't ever stop, do you?" Hajime tossed a dirty shirt at Oikawa, which he caught. He chucked it straight back, and it hit him square in the chest.

"Why do you keep me around, Iwa-chan?" He said in a tone that was almost serious, but Hajime knew him better than to believe that he was.

He allowed a small smirk. "I love endless torment." 

Oikawa laughed, giving Hajime a small smile. "Well, I'd better get off! I mean. Get out." He gave a wider, sleazier grin.

Hajime groaned. "Right. Get out."

He spent the rest of his morning cleaning his room, and he didn't eat breakfast since it was too late. He was hungry, tired, and he couldn't evade the thoughts and images of Oikawa he had filed carefully in his mind. The feeling was vaguely familiar to him. When he met Oikawa, he was new on the block. His dad apparently traveled a lot, so they were meant to leave fairly soon, or so he said as Hajime prodded bugs into jars. Oikawa thought he was gross: he wore too many bandaids on his knees, his hair was messy and had too much gel in it, and his clothes were all dirty. Worst of all, he was playing with bugs.

Hajime had punched him. His mother saw from the porch, he remembered. After she tended to Oikawa's bloody nose and swollen, teary mess of a face, she told Hajime that "Tooru has trouble making friends". She told him to invite him over, because he might have more in common than he thought. But she also made him apologize to the weeping mess. Oikawa had said sorry first, actually. That night, he had gone to bed, thinking about who Oikawa could be. He stayed up most of the night thinking about catching lightning bugs, playing pirates, those kind of things. He was annoyed, upset, angry. But he knew would be the perfect partner for all of his antics. He sort of smiled at the memory and the hazy familiarity of it. He wished things were still as simple.

\--

Around 5, he got a text from Oikawa.

_OIKAWA: hey! :-)_

He rolled his eyes and tossed his phone away. He was in the middle of an episode of a terribly-written Korean drama, which he wasn’t particularly committed to. It was just a good distraction. He knew Oikawa would still tell him what he wanted anyway, regardless of whether or not he texted back. So he kept watching.

_OIKAWA: we're going to that movie tonight. :-)_

Hajime groaned. He was so pointlessly vague sometimes.

_TO OIKAWA: who_

OIKAWA: us, stupid! i'll be there in ten minutes. unless you want to drive.

Dammit. Great.

_TO OIKAWA: no, I'm busy_

OIKAWA: don't lie, iwa-chan. you don't have any friends! see you then!

Whatever. He stood and turned off the TV, and his mother came in holding a large hamper. She paused to watch him.

"You alright, Hajime?" She said, setting down the basket of fresh laundry on the coffee table.

"Fine. I'm going to the movies." He said.

She nodded. "With Oikawa?" 

He scoffed. "Who else?"

"You two crack me up," She laughed gently as she started on folding. "Have fun!"

"I'll try," he said as he paced down the hallway and into his room. He pulled a clean shirt from his closet, only to see that it was Oikawa's. He was always leaving his crap at his house, and his mom must have picked this up off the floor. He stared at it for a moment before he chose something else instead.

He was intent on staying quiet, even though he really did enjoy going to movies with Oikawa. He was really annoying, always interjecting his various thoughts and small jokes. It was like attending the movie with a personal commentator. But it always made the horrible movies pretty good movies. Or at least somewhat enjoyable movies. Hajime couldn't help but egg it on, either. Tonight, he wasn't really in the mood for it. Nor did he want the attention from Oikawa.

Oikawa was at the door fairly quick, all smiles and hugs for his mother, as usual. He was always hamming it up for her. It was more annoying that she humored him and played along.

As Hajime approached the door Oikawa's face lit up. "Let's go, I don't want to be late, Iwa-chan. It was a pleasure, as usual." He nodded at Hajime's mother politely as they stepped off the porch. She chuckled and waved to them wordlessly.

Hajime said nothing as they got into Oikawa’s father’s tiny car, but Oikawa didn't seem bothered. They drove the whole way in silence.

When they pulled into a parking spot, Oikawa looked at Hajime, completely expressionless. "You've looked better."

"Thanks?" Hajime glared at him, but Oikawa's unfaltering stare was making him uneasy. It reminded him of that stupid, stupid dream.

"What's bothering you?" Oikawa asked.

"We're going to be late." The clock read fifteen til. If they didn’t leave in another few minutes, they’d be sitting in the front row.

Oikawa laughed. "Oh, I know you don't care."

He was right, since he would be bored the entire time anyway. He wasn't humoring Oikawa today. He was always cold to him in a stupid, joking way, but he wanted to lay it on thick. And he definitely didn’t want to have some stupid heart-to-heart in the too-small car.

"Let's just go." Hajime said, unlocking his door.

"Stop!" Oikawa interrupted. "Tell me what you're upset about. I'm sorry about the wet dream thing. I didn't mean to hit home or anything."

Hajime sighed. "We're not talking about the wet dream shit. Let's just watch the stupid movie."

"So it is about the wet dream then." Oikawa's stare was unchanging and focused. It was ridiculous to keep this going. He was hot with embarrassment and his hands clutched fistfuls of his jeans. Hajime wasn't sure what the right answer was. He couldn't just say it out loud, and he didn't want to talk about it. It wasn't Oikawa's business, even if he was the one in the dream.

"I thought so," Oikawa sighed. "It was about me, wasn't it?"

Hajime's stomach did a flip. "What the fuck, Oikawa? No, no. It wasn't, no. Don't say stupid shit."

"I already knew, and the way you were sleeping. You were sort of mumbling. I heard my name. Plus, you were so odd about it. I couldn't help but be curious. Then I found your briefs in the morning, and I was pretty sure. Then you ignored me the rest of the day, until now."

"You're a shithead, Oikawa. Don't read into any of that. I always ignore you."

"You're not denying it."

"You've already made your cynical accusation. You’re already convinced. There's nothing to redeem myself from."

"You say that as if I am such a bad idea. Right? But you said it, my name, you said it so softly I--"

"Shut up! Shut up, Oikawa!" Hajime's hands shook. "Just. Stop."

When he turned to look at him, Oikawa's eyes were huge, and his lips were small and downturned. He looked frightened, as if Hajime was about to hit him (and he wouldn’t).

"Sorry," was all Oikawa said, looking at his knotted fingers placed gingerly in his lap.

Hajime knew it was genuine. Besides, Oikawa wouldn't have looked into it so much if he wasn't so interested in it. It was embarrassing, but Hajime had avoided overthinking things all day. After all, it was a dream. There was still that gentle, lethargic nudge of that happened, but only to you. Admittedly, he was curious, especially after last night. He always had been. It was true that Oikawa wasn’t hard on the eyes, and even beneath the filthy facade, he did care, and he did understand. Hajime had never kissed anyone, and Oikawa was probably the opposite. But it didn’t matter, really, not in the scheme of things. Not like Hajime had any major plans for that, except to maybe ignore how he felt.

In the end, he probably shouldn’t be so angry with Oikawa. It wasn’t his fault it happened, and it probably would have been less hurt for him if he had just laughed it off. He really didn’t know how to feel though, in other respects. It was… nice, but it wasn’t real, and it wasn’t actually Oikawa. Even though it made his chest ache, at least in the smallest of ways. He cared about him a lot, regardless of how shitty and annoying he could be. Oikawa was still important to him.

"Hey, hey." Hajime eventually sighed. He put a hand on Oikawa's arm. "Listen. It's fine. I don't know what to think about it. It was just a dream. I'm just embarrassed."

Oikawa was silent.

"And, I mean. I'm sorry if it was weird, or that I kept it from you. I know you don't... It was..." His eyes closed. "Tooru. I'm sorry."

Oikawa slowly turned to him, face sullen. His eyes seemed a little red, like he was holding in some tears. But he smiled.

"Iwa--Hajime, you're so stupid. And ugly." 

"W-hey! You stupid freak!" Hajime exclaimed.

"Do you wanna see this damn movie or not? It starts in five minutes."

"Alright, Oikawa. Why the hell not?"

Some of the fire returned to Oikawa's eyes.

\--

They walked out of the movie laughing, even though it wasn't funny. It was one of those crazy killer alien movies, one that was actually pretty frightening. Oikawa's girlish, playful screams were pointedly to make him laugh, and he did a good job. They were chuckling all the way to the car, with Oikawa cracking bad jokes about the movie. Hajime watched him laugh, all hearty and careless. It was nice.

Maybe Hajime would just let himself relax. He was comfortable anyway. Oikawa knew now, so it wasn’t a big deal. He would probably get teased. It didn’t matter to him. He plopped into the car at the same time as Oikawa, and they continued their banter until they pulled up outside of Hajime’s house. It was already dark inside, and his parents had probably turned in early. They both had to get to work in the morning.

They sat for a few moments in silence, Oikawa’s hands still resting on the wheel.

Eventually, Hajime laughed.

“What?” Oikawa said  
.  
“Nothing. Just a weird day.”

Oikawa nodded. “It’s alright. It’s fitting for such a weird person.” He almost seemed nervous to Hajime, but he didn’t pay it much mind.

“Whatever. Thanks for the movie. It was fun.” Hajime said, and he was about to push the door open when Oikawa stopped him. He looked at Hajime, tame and expressionless.

“What?” Hajime faced him.

Oikawa blinked, multiple times. He seemed to be searching for the right words.

“Hey, quit being so--”

“Hajime,” He started.

“What?”

Oikawa’s eyes bore directly into his own. “Can I kiss you?”

The only word Hajime could muster tumbled from his mouth.

“Why?”

Oikawa smiled, and then he laughed, so loudly that Hajime almost got out of the car. God, why was he such a weirdo? He was embarrassed enough. This was all so stupid.

Oikawa slowed enough to smile at Hajime again, softly. It was an unreadable gaze.

“Damn, Hajime. Because I want to.” His voice was husky and solemn.

But why? Hajime wanted to scream. There were five thousand conflicting thoughts barraging him all at once. This wasn’t right, this was his best friend, he can’t ruin this, he’s toying with you, he’s going to _kill_ you, is he really going to kiss you? Good lord, he is, and what are you going to do? Fucking kiss him back? Holy shit. Holy shit. He was going to explode.

“You’re so odd, Iwa-chan.” He shook his head.

“Fine.” Hajime pursed his lips.

“What?”

“Do it. Make fun of me, get it over with.”

“I’m not going to.” Oikawa seemed confused, but he played along.

“Then what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to kiss you, Hajime, like I asked.”

“Then fucking do it.” He grunted.

Regardless, Oikawa’s worn, calloused hands pressed themselves to Hajime’s cheeks. He felt his heart flutter. Oh god, he was really fucking doing this. Oikawa’s hair brushed his nose, and his breath was soft and warm against his face. He stiffened like a board, thinking a hundred things at once. Like how he really did want to be kissed. If this wasn't all some sort of sick ruse, Hajime wasn't sure how he might take it. Oikawa’s lips hovered over his own. Damn, was he dying? He couldn’t breath. The anticipation was making him antsy. Hajime pressed his lips hard against Oikawa’s, almost physically pushing him away. Fuck. Fuck this shit. He licked his lips, ignoring the unfamiliar taste of someone else's. _Oh god, save me_ was suddenly all that filled Hajime's mind.

Oikawa pulled away. “Damn, Iwa. Relax.”

Hajime groaned with embarrassment, but Oikawa came in again. This time, he went straight in, pressing their lips together softly. He was so gentle that it was unsettling. Hajime thought he would melt, but he carefully held himself together. He kissed him back, if that was what he was doing. He wasn’t really sure. It was really slow and sleepy and relaxed. Damn, it was so nice. Oikawa was nice. He decided that was a good word for him, his… friend.

Hajime finally pulled away, though he found himself not really wanting to.

Oikawa smiled at him again, keeping his lips together and just allowing the corners to turn. He nodded slowly.

“What?” Hajime asked gingerly.

“I liked it.” Oikawa continued to nod. “A lot.”

Hajime looked at his palms. “Yeah.”

“Are you okay?”

Hajime almost laughed. “I’m great. I don’t know how to feel. But I’m great.”

Oikawa smiled, but he didn’t say anything. They sort of watched each other in a strange silence. Disbelief was probably Hajime’s strongest emotion at the moment. He wanted the night alone to mull it over, but he didn’t really want his best friend to leave.

“I should leave you alone, Hajime.” Oikawa said, as if on cue.

“Okay,” Hajime agreed. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Oikawa gave a glittering smile as his hands returned to the wheel. “Goodnight, Iwa-chan.”

Hajime rolled his eyes. “Goodnight, asshat.”

\--

When he came inside, his parents were nestled into the couch watching the end of a movie. His dad was asleep, but his mom’s eyes were still glued to the television.

“Hi, Hajime,” She said and yawned.

“Hey. I thought you two had work in the morning?” He placed his house key down on the table and kicked off his shoes.

She nodded. “We do. We just wanted to make sure you got home okay. I know that boy’s driving.”

Hajime chuckled fondly. “Yeah.”

“Was the movie okay?”

“It was alright.” Hajime said. But it probably wasn't the best part of his evening.

She laughed, and she woke her sleeping husband. “Well, I’m glad you had fun then.”

Hajime smiled. “Yeah. Goodnight!”

His dad gave a goofy smile and returned the goodnight. 

His mom smiled. “I love you,” she said.

Hajime headed to the bathroom and took off his shirt. As usual, he washed his face, brushed his teeth. The normal stuff. But he felt relieved, maybe a little different. He had a lot to think about tonight. And for once, it wasn’t girl problems. He wasn't sure how this was a comforting thought, but it was. His lips felt tingly, like the way you feel after leaving the ocean after hours of swimming. He supposed it was a lot like the lapping of waves. It was a satisfying feeling.

He came into his room, and found Oikawa’s discarded shirt by his bed. He picked it up, and tossed it between his hands before deciding to slip into it. He took off his jeans slowly, maybe even thoughtfully. He was hyper aware of how everything felt. He carefully went over the night's events as he climbed under the covers.

As he lay quietly in his bed, he vaguely remembered his conversation with Oikawa the previous night. His stupid, whiny voice echoed in his memory:

_"But what if she wasn't like everyone else? What if she was different, hmm? What would you say then?"_

Damn it.

**Author's Note:**

> wow ok! this was done very quickly, so please forgive any small mistakes! especially in the plot. i'm also starting to understand that i have no idea how to write sexy stuff. oops. and things move too fast? well i don't think they move FAST enough!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (kidding) I think you get the point.
> 
> anyway, i hope you at least enjoyed it! this was written for my best friend so she could have a little weekend fluff while she was on vacation. thanks as always for reading!! ♥


End file.
